cord of four strands

So long anonymity

2010-07-14T21:46:00.000-07:00

Actual conversation this afternoon while ordering our new telephone for our upcoming move:

Her: "Are you owning or renting?"
Me: "Renting"
"Do you have the names of the landlords?"
"Yes. [Gave names]. Do you need me to spell the last name?"
"No," she laughed, "we have one of those working here in the office. Your occupation?"
"Teacher."
"Is this at the high school?"
"Yes."
"Are you the new math teacher?"
"I guess my reputation precedes me."

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Aren't we done already?

2010-06-24T19:54:00.000-07:00

You know exactly who I'm talking about. The friend who, whenever he lost, said "OK, two out of three." Then he'd lose again. "OK, three out of five."

I can only imagine that John Isner's favorite retort was "OK, best 70 out of 138."

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Not dead, just dormant

2010-06-17T23:50:00.000-07:00

I recently looked back on some older posts. I recalled stories I'd shared about family, life, our kids, etc. So as "busy" as things are now, and probably always will be to some extent, I'm probably switching back to normal entries. Short stories (brevity is the soul of wit, after all). Real stories.

But the blog's name will soon be changing. It kind of has to. Another "strand" is being added soon. And we wouldn't want to leav out baby ... *cough* ahem ... oops. I almost shared his name.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Spring break: Day 7 - I wonder what is in store for me this summer

2010-04-09T08:04:00.000-07:00

April 19, 1997 - My friend and I drive exactly 666 miles, proceeded by four lousy months for us both.

April 9, 2010 - I drove 777 miles to return home from said friend's home.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Spring break: Day 5

2010-04-06T20:09:00.001-07:00

While on a convenient yet fairly cramped ride on a municipal light rail, my thoughts merged with memories from the other day's zoo visit.

I wish I should sleep standing on one leg.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Spring break: Days 3 and 4 - there is no such thing as "quality" time ... time is measured in quantity

2010-04-05T23:46:00.000-07:00

Two days, two father/son breakfasts. The first one I was dad; the second day son.

It'll be easy to plan more of these as "dad," remembering my joy at being the junior.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Spring break: Day 2

2010-04-03T19:26:00.000-07:00

Family trip to the Oakland Zoo: free with our annual pass.
Trip across town to Safeway: one dollar in gas.
Apricot Mango yogurt (Maia's choice): forty-five cents plus tax.
Daddy daughter date: priceless.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

It's weird not updating everyone on every part of my life, but the Facebook break has been nice

2010-03-28T23:20:00.000-07:00

That this blog links to Facebook might mislead some. I haven't logged in since February 17, which was also our 9th anniversary. Actual updates, though, will have to wait until after Easter Sunday.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Talk about your segues

2010-03-21T23:18:00.000-07:00

Driving home last night, we were hysterically laughing at our kids' laughs. When it slowed, I told our son explicitly "I REALLY like your laugh."

His response: "yeah, hey these raisins are DRY!"

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Happy pi day!

2010-03-14T08:07:00.000-07:00

Fun fact: a circle drawn around the entire known universe can be drawn within 1 proton's accuracy using only the first 43 digits of pi. The rest of those numbers are just vanity.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

A shameless sampler

2010-03-12T18:35:00.000-08:00

I used to feign interest in the food items being hocked at Costco, standing, savoring, asking a couple questions about the price; what a waste of time. A line's building at another table.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

I was wrong. But more importantly: he was right.

2010-03-09T22:09:00.001-08:00

Playing "guess the letter" with my son, I asked him to name the second-to-last.

He responded with "B to Z." I started to say no.

Think about it. He was right.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

This isn't in Proverbs, but if written today it might be

2010-03-08T22:20:00.001-08:00

Few things in life are more valuable than a friend. A cup of joe, a heartfelt exchange, sage advice, a couple laughs, some reminiscing, a short prayer, all before 7 in the morning.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Should I change the name of the blog?

2010-03-06T23:46:00.000-08:00

It was once a blog about the family. The name is a spinoff of scripture. Now the family's growing and the blog has changed. I have some ideas, but what do you think?

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

A day of action

2010-03-04T22:36:00.001-08:00

While I can appreciate and in many cases agree with the sentiments of those who participated in today's day of action, I just have to ask: what is going to be different tomorrow?

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Not my fault, but perhaps my responsibility

2010-03-02T09:18:00.000-08:00

Trimester schedule means it's finals week. Yesterday I passed a paper back to a student who's failing miserably. But I felt bad. I don't know anything about him. What could've I done differently?

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

People dressed as the Statue of Liberty can get away with anything

2010-03-01T20:53:00.001-08:00

I watched him place his hat on the ground, dance away from it, and dance back toward it before picking it back up. He had a large sign for a local tax company.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

who's teaching who?

2010-02-20T20:40:00.001-08:00

A conversation at home the other night after our daughter said "yewo"

Me: "Alright, can you say yellow."
Her: "Yes."
"Yellow"
(pause) "Yeeeeeee-ess"
"Yellow"
"Yes"
"Honey, yellow."
(Somewhat impatiently), "yes, dad, that's right!"

-------
This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Today's tragedy in Austin hit pretty close to home ... or work

2010-02-18T20:08:00.000-08:00

As the crow flies, the places where my wife and I worked in Austin were 6,500 feet apart. Today's plane crash in Austin was immediately between those two buildings.

This map shows all three points.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

Ashes and subluxations

2010-02-18T09:50:00.000-08:00

How intriguing it is that God can work through so many means - including but not limited to spiritual and physical - to create proper alignment in our lives. His persistence and resources are limitless.

This post is linked to facebook through the blog.

I had a birthday recently so now I get an extra word for each entry

2009-12-29T21:21:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I like being told I'm really good at something.

But when it means getting compared to another person it becomes uneasy.

Perhaps I only like the idea of being good at something.

Advantages of being at a conference just a 5-minute walk from the Pacific

2009-12-06T21:41:00.000-08:00

In the moonlit darkness, I hurled rock after egg-sized rock into the crashing waves. They either disappeared into the starry night or the deafening water. But the rocks didn't make another sound.

A good week

2009-11-05T10:11:00.001-08:00

This week:
- finally found my best friend from my year in Brazil
- said "thank-you" to junior high math teacher's widow
- patched things with a very dear friend
- visiting friends/family this weekend

an amazing talent, and it's ok if it's never again honed

2009-10-19T20:23:00.001-07:00

Some people like road trips. Others: not so much. Our sweet daughter helped us to learn something new today: if a raisin is stuffed far enough up the nose, tweezers are required.

you can surprise some of the kids all of the time ...

2009-10-15T20:21:00.000-07:00

A typical conversation:

"Mr. Ratliff," shocked, "you have a facebook?"
"Yes," wryly.
"What do you DO on facebook?" incredulously.
Retort: "what do YOU do?"
"Well, everything," perplexed, "and nothing."
Smugly: "mm-hmm."

[post-script beyond the 32-word tome: I expressly do not befriend current or potential students]

some cities shut down at the sight of the first snowflake, others drive on ice

2009-10-13T19:57:00.000-07:00

It rained pretty hard here today. But I was unprepared for indoor events getting canceled. No Bible study tonight, and our school's Thursday earthquake drill will no longer include a building evacuation.

irony. or something.

2009-10-12T21:37:00.000-07:00

While approaching a car that was in the slow lane I noticed it was marked "student driver."

There was no student in the car; only an instructor driving. On his cell phone.

lazy day

2009-10-11T20:36:00.000-07:00

Saturday night church became Sunday morning church because of company, but I had over 100 tests to grade. I won't lie: it was pretty nice staying in my jammies until after 5.

don't need no stinking pictures

2009-10-10T22:48:00.000-07:00

As I tucked A4 into bed tonight, he requested tonight's Bible story be from mine, not his.

"That means no pictures."

He grinned, nodded, and we read about wisdom from Proverbs 10.

32-word post, Entry IV

2009-10-09T23:49:00.000-07:00

Here's what was reinforced from my day's experiences today:

I love my job.
My job can drive me nuts.
I miss my family when I'm gone all day.
I hate the Yankees.

she had a point

2009-10-08T20:01:00.000-07:00

After today's test, students had a textbook assignment called "Are You Ready?" Upon the 2nd reminder to one student , she protested, saying "I know I bombed the test. And I'm not ready."

teaching

2009-10-07T20:53:00.000-07:00

A student who moved to our country 6 weeks ago might move back, and wanted my advice. In Spanish.

Forget angles and equations; this was the most important conversation I had today.

same blogger, different rules

2009-10-06T09:48:00.001-07:00

I have decided to take a pithy approach of posts of exactly thirty-two words. Until my birthday, that is. I have enjoyed other peoples' blogs with a similar approach, so why not?

Hibernation

2009-06-13T18:58:00.000-07:00

Following the lead of several others, I am putting the blog on the back burner. I looked back at posts I have made over the past 8 months, and of dozens of comments, only 1 or 2 were from people that don't already follow me on Facebook. So -- I'm still alive ... but I liked one other hibernator's explanation and echo the motivation: I get a lot more feedback and it's more of a conversation than I'd get from the blog. Hope you'll join me there!

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from the family blog

In how many capital cities have YOU lived?

2009-06-08T22:50:00.000-07:00

Short version for now. I got a job offer.

I found out this afternoon on my way home from running some errands, including set-up for an accelerated college class I start teaching tomorrow night.

We will be moving to Sacramento. My summer vacation gets cut short, and I could be at work as soon as June 29. But that means 8-9 weeks I don't have to worry about not getting paid, too.

We're already scrambling. New home. New church. New friends. New new new ...

To be continued ...

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from the family blog

All worth it

2009-06-03T12:46:00.000-07:00

One of my more contemptuous students over the past few months has been on and off of my good side depending on the day. I have shared with my wife that I really do like her, but some days I want to strangle her (figuratively, not literally) because of her behavior in class and her treatment of others. Yesterday, she told me that she was going to be writing me an apology letter. I told her that I would be glad to accept it, but honestly I didn't really think I would really see anything. Today, though, I did receive it. Please keep in mind that she is aware that my current school has not rehired me for next year, so this was something that could have been blown off.

Here is the letter (the image below was also on her letter):

Dear Mr. Ratliff,

We didn't get off to a very good start this year. I know it was mainly because of me. I thought that you were a kind of push over teacher. But you sure showed me up. Today I finally realized that you really did care. You always put us kids before your self and you also keep giving and giving. And I really appreciate that. So once again thanks. I enjoyed being in your class. Even know I did cause a bit of trouble. Your one of my teachers that understand and cared and I am sure going to miss you if your not here next year. And once again sorry for being so mean to you this year. I truly am sorry. So thanks.

Love always,
name withheld

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from the family blog

Must. Keep. Straight. Face.

2009-05-04T20:22:00.000-07:00

Another story relayed by mommy ... A4 and M2 are on the ladder to our outdoor playscape a few days ago. From mommy's vantage point, M2 is near the top, but is getting increasingly fussy. It's the type of fussy that is a clear giveaway that she is being harassed somehow by her older brother. It might be in good fun, but she's not enjoying it.

Seizing the opportunity to share this distinction with A4, Mommy brings both children together. She crouches down to their level, holding one hand with each of hers, and she asks our son what he needs to say.

"Sorry."

"Sorry for what," prods mommy.

"Sorry," he tells his sister, "for pushing you on the ladder."

Mommy thought he was done. But he sighed, then continued "and for kissing your buns."

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from the family blog

It takes a long time to make this type of money

2009-05-02T10:40:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was scheduled to umpire a baseball game at 4:00pm. On my way south from school, changing from school garb to umpire uniform in the car, it was evident that the forecasted rainstorm was here to stay. But I had received no indication of cancellation or postponement.

I arrived at the field, met the other umpire, who was equally shocked that they were going to try to get a game in with these conditions. We walked onto the field about 20 minutes before gametime. Both teams were ready to play, so we started at about 3:46pm. Apparently it's the last chance either of them have to get in this league game.

By virtue of us arriving at the field, we were guaranteed half the game fee. It's the home team's decision to start the game, but once the game is underway, it's the umpires' decision to cancel the game.

With two outs in the bottom of the first inning, the home plate umpire thought he noticed the pitcher slipping as he made his deliveries to home plate. He called time, and I went to the mound. When I took a step forward from the pitcher's plate, my foot then slid about 8 inches in the muck. There was no way we could continue the game, and the rain was persistently falling.

While we gladly would have toughed it out in the elements had it been safe, we had no choice but to call it.

But that meant we racked up some nice rates, including over $10 per out, and -- with a game time of 12 minutes -- an hourly rate closing in on $300.

Too bad I couldn't keep that up for awhile.

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from the family blog

Have you dreamed a dream?

2009-04-13T14:37:00.001-07:00

Here is the latest viral video, again from Britain's Got Talent.

You will be blown away.

The 7-minute video from Les Misérables is here.

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from the family blog

Only those medically necessary

2009-04-08T08:15:00.001-07:00

During a recent trip to the post office, so says mommy, A3 noticed a sign on the door on the way out. He quickly and accurately read it, saying out loud to mommy, "that sign says no pets."

No sooner was mommy saying "that's right," that A3 continued.

"No fish, no dogs, no cats." A brief pause. Perhaps to think up the finale. Perhaps to draw emphasis to ostensibly the most important part of the list.

"No squirrels."

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from the family blog

What time is it, anyway?

2009-03-31T13:26:00.000-07:00

I'm rather surprised, but one of my sharper sophomores just looked at the wall clock in my classroom, trying to discern how much time remains until the bell rings to start class, and threw a hand at it, saying "I don't know how to read those."

I looked in my PDF copy of the state mathematics framework and found this Kindergarten standard (page 11): Demonstrate an understanding of concepts of time (e.g., morning, afternoon, evening, today, yesterday, tomorrow, week, year) and tools that measure time(e.g., clock, calendar).

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from the family blog

Shamless plug

2009-03-28T08:35:00.000-07:00

In my efforts to provide some "real-life" connections for my remedial math courses (3 of the 4 I teach), I tapped a long-ago coworker who currently works with DeVry University. He came to my classroom yesterday to present "Career Shop," which was probably 20% DeVry and 80% career and personality assessments.

The local paper stopped by, and today's Local section has a front-page write-up on the visit. The online version is here.

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from the family blog

There's irony in here somewhere

2009-03-25T08:36:00.000-07:00

"Do you have a copy of today's paper?" I asked, in an office previously known to have several.

"No," was the reply. "It's online now. It's paperless."

"A paperless paper," I pondered.

Semantically, making a paper paperless would make it ( ). Kind of like when you take the cheese out of the cheeseburger, and then take the burger out.

The best "Danny Boy" rendition you'll ever see

2009-03-17T09:51:00.000-07:00

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

A vowel makes all the difference

2009-03-15T22:25:00.000-07:00

Our son, almost 4 years old, dug in his heels the other night over the topic of his mother's cooking. As soon as the plate of new potatoes, peas and carrots, and shredded beef was set before him, he replied with a vociferous "YUCK," drawing out the final sound as if he were practicing his Deutsche.

Mommy needed a rest from the tirade, and I obliged as she took our daughter for a bike ride (daughter in the trailer). Since Aden had failed to make progress on his dinner after about 30 minutes, he received the pre-announced one-way trip to bed. At 6:25. No AWANA. No dinner. No evening time with the family.

Through his hysterical pleas for mercy, I was sharing with him how rude it was to respond to mommy's hard work to provide him with good food by saying "YUCKKKKK," making sure to add the static to the "K" that he had intentionally drawn out.

His crying slowed a bit, and he managed to say between gasps. I didn't say "YUCKKKKKK," I said "ykkkkkkk." (Imagine the word sans vowel).

Had I only known.

Not pink

2009-03-15T00:43:00.000-07:00

Since I'm on an internship and a temporary contract to teach this year, I was fully expecting a layoff notice; even had the market conditions been different.

So my biggest disappointment of the process so far is not that I don't have employment after June 4. It's that a "pink" slip came on white letterhead.

That Guy

2009-02-24T08:01:00.000-08:00

Got hooked up with spinning classes at least for this week (maybe next week, too). I'm in Boot Camp. Again. This morning during spinning, though, a guy brings his bike into the room about 20 minutes into the 60-minute class.

Then he starts pedaling away like mad. I couldn't figure out if he thought he was all that because he could pedal 200rpm's 20 minutes into a spinning class, or if he thought he would catch up to us.

If he was trying to catch up, we had already climbed like 18 hills already, so his pedaling around like mad was tantamount to him just going in circles at the bottom of the first hill we climbed.

8 years ago today ...

2009-02-16T21:32:00.000-08:00

... I was running around town getting some last minute plans together. Family and friends were gathering from all around. Seven of my closest friends would stand up with me the next day, and they along with another cadre of 10 or so all paraded me around town for awhile. I wore a two-sizes-too-small baseball uniform and belted out "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" in the Winco parking lot.

One friend was able to get us into a junior high school gym where we had the coolest game of whiffle ball ever.

Groomsmen and other friends were all invited to stay at my hotel room that night. Elsewhere in the city, a nervous bride-to-be had an equally non-licentious night with her close friends.

Someone had a PlayStation for the hotel room. But the hotel TV was hardwired so that you couldn't connect ancillary devices. However, one member of our entourage, already trained as a locksmith, pulled a McGeyver with some electrical tape and clever wiring and was able to bypass this. So we enjoyed several more hours of gaming before about 7 guys crashed on beds or floorspace throughout the room.

Six months of planning was essentially over. It was the end of a chapter of my life.

Tomorrow I would earn a new title: husband.

Happy birthdays!

2009-02-12T08:02:00.000-08:00

Today we pause to honor the following birthdays:

Abraham Lincoln - 200

Maia - 2

Scrabble Schmabble

2009-02-08T22:21:00.000-08:00

This weekend I had a 7-letter word dropped on me. "INCLINES" with a blank tile for the "N" bridging the top left corner to the word "SLIT" I had just built off the middle left triple word. 30 point word. 50 points for using all 7 tiles.

At that point, I was losing 168-82.

Fast forward to the end.
I had 4 tiles: E E I E
Opponent had one: Q

I earned 29 points from those 4 tiles while my opponent watched helplessly. He lost 10 points for holding the Q and I earned those 10 points (a 20-point swing).

Final score:
Jered 314
Kevin 302

Good times.

Numbers

2009-02-03T17:34:00.000-08:00

So far my 7.5 pounds in three weeks has me in 4th place out of 10 competitors in a local "Biggest Loser" competition. I need to lose 4.5 this week to avoid a $5 penalty (4% in 4 weeks). If my lunches this week are anything like yesterdays (leftover shepherd's pie, a 6-oz yogurt, mini carrots, an apple, a cutie (see below), and a V-8, it can't hurt.

I also update the results on the side bar to your left.

But 1st place, at 5.72% so far, would be 16.1 pounds (or 5.4/week), so I have some work to do to catch up.
*****
I just received a file on our 1st term grades (by teacher). On the block schedule, this is the semester grades running from mid-October through the end of the calendar year.

Of 40 teachers, my students' GPA ranked 37th. For the first semester (August through mid-October), they were 7th. But that was (A) when I had only 2 classes and (B) hadn't myself gotten into the swing of more objective grading.

I know a large part of it: 2 of my 3 classes included juniors and seniors who mostly shrugged off a final project that constituted 10% of their semester grade. No work = no points. (Same goes for plagiarism, but I'll save that story for another day).

My students had the highest percentage of D's, but one of the lowest percentage of F's.

Had the "we're just not doing this project" bug not swept through, the grades would have been essentially your classic bell curve.

bye iPod

2009-01-26T19:31:00.000-08:00

Today my iPod nano was stolen from my classroom. I certainly should have kept it in my pocket or something, but it was clearly in my workspace, and a student would have to have reached over a large printer or around another item in order to snag it. Crazy. I was in my classroom any time there was a student in there, and as usual it was locked when I was not in there.

There goes my running music. And all my podcasts. Nothing terribly personal on it or anything, but it's a terrible sense of violation.

So frustrating.

Tragedy ... is this right?

2009-01-24T23:24:00.000-08:00

A student I know transferred from a nearby high school a few months ago. This student was a wreck yesterday in my class, and I excused them from class. Another teacher saw them distraught near my classroom, and not knowing me to be the torturing kind, quickly came to the emotional aid of the student.

It turns out that a childhood friend of this student committed suicide on Thursday.

Within 15 miles of Redding.

There is literally no news on this. Our local paper has a "no suicide" policy.

There have now been at least 2 unreported suicides in the area this school year.

There were two deaths closely connected with overconsumption of alcohol by high-schoolers during Christmas break (one in Redding and one in Chico). These events were very well-publicized.

But nothing on the suicides.

I don't know the benefits or potential downfalls of these discussions, but guaranteed these kids talk about it. And they see us "grown-ups" not talking about it.

At least not in our media.

Should this be a more public discussion? Or would it just get worse if brought into the open?

I'm rooting for the wrong perennial losers

2009-01-18T18:20:00.000-08:00

Redding's hitting 80 degrees in January. An African-American is about to be inaugurated as president of the United States. And now this ...

The Arizona Cardinals will be in the Super Bowl. Those of you who aren't football fans (first of all, shame on you), this is the first time they have played for the championship game in over 60 years. They are a 110-year old franchise with only two championships to their credit.

That sounds like another franchise I faithfully root for.

Growing up, I owned two NFL t-shirts. One was for the San Diego Chargers, and the other was for the St. Louis Cardinals (of the NFL, before the move to Phoenix). I decided to call the Dolphins my team of choice.

And in a year that both made the playoffs, the Dolphins showed their ineptitude in the post-season once again. Or maybe it's a curse for having me as a fan.

In the meantime, though, go Cardinals!

Normal tacos?

2009-01-17T15:13:00.000-08:00

Something struck me as a little odd about the banner on top of a 7/11. It said

their Supreme Omelet Taquitos were 2-for-$1.99.

Taquito, I recalled, means "little taco" in Spanish.

So what they are selling, in fact, are Supreme Little Tacos.

He Said It, Part 2

2009-01-15T08:12:00.001-08:00

Setting: a gym at a nearby intersection completely comprised of windows facing both streets
A3: Mommy, what is that?
L: That's a gym.
A3: Who's Gym?
L: That's where people go to exercise honey.

flash forward a few days

Setting: the same intersection
A3: Mom, maybe when I grow up I can go to the exercise school.

I'm a loser, baby

2009-01-12T08:39:00.000-08:00

Excuse the gratuitous 90's grunge reference, but today's the day I jump back on the wagon. (Jerry Seinfeld might disagree.)

Today's the day, though, that I begin becoming a loser.

I've hooked up with a college friend (also now our insurance agent) for a local version of biggest loser. There's been some good progress over the past year. I kept off weight for most of the year (most being roughly through September). In March I began a running program (a first for me). I kept this up through early July, around the time I participated in a 5-mile run in Mt. Shasta. Then, things got busy. I picked up a rural paper route in mid-July; 2:30am mornings precluded exercise. This lasted a month, but a few days after this ended I switched careers and became a teacher. I never took the time to get back to the fitness, even though it had done me a lot of good.

Today, though, I'm back.

My peak weight (just before beginning Weight Watchers in June 2007) was 306.5. I'd dropped all the way to 259, but after months of carelessness have found myself at my initial "BL" weigh-in of 281.5. I have 12 weeks to win the contest, but just as before I intend for these to be positive and permanent changes.

You can follow the contest here, though I will be posting updates and possibly a "lose-o-meter" on the side.

All I want for Christmas ...

2008-12-11T07:27:00.001-08:00

It's snowing

2008-12-03T11:17:00.001-08:00

New effect added courtesy of the blogger buster site.

A razão prà estação

2008-12-01T23:12:00.000-08:00

Of the many blog/RSS feeds I follow is the online newspaper from my hometown during my year as an exchange student in Brazil. The city's name is Jundiaí ( here you can see its proximity to the 3rd largest city in the world).

One of the things that struck me about Christmastime in Brazil 14 years ago was its lack of commercialism. So I was saddened a bit to read an article with the headline that translates to "Downtown: Stores Open Until 10pm"

I was trying to figure out why all the downtown shops would be open until 10pm. When I read the article, it was all about the gear-up for the holidays. The article was filed under the "Rhythm of Christmas" section.

In 1994, I had to explain to my host family why my parents and loved ones were so interested in mailing down so many gifts for Christmas. Truthfully there weren't a large number of gifts being sent, but to them more than a couple of them seemed excessive. There were gifts for each person in the family in that care package, including the live-in maid. Our Christmas tree was a small potted tree (about waist-high) from outside that they brought in and put a few decorations on. Each family member received one gift, and they were token gifts at that.

So what a shock to see that Christmas spending is estimated to increase 25%-40% over November's. And that 14 downtown streets collaborated for a $200k-$300k Christmas lighting display.

This would be normal for an American store, but for years I have cherished the fact that not every place on the planet was like America this time of year.

Until now.

What if Starbucks marketed like a church?

2008-11-30T21:33:00.000-08:00

I've often wondered what church looked like for someone who wasn't used to church.

Hat-tip on this to Andrew Sullivan who posted the item from Richard Reisling's site.

Why bother?

2008-11-07T09:49:00.000-08:00

The first real post from the teaching realm ...

... last night my Algebra I class had homework assigned to them. At the beginning of class today, 7 out of the 35 students turned it in to me. I decided the information was pertinent enough that they needed to get it in, so I gave them another 18 minutes to complete it. Eight more arrived.

Clearly something isn't working.

For the lesson near the end of class, I promised them that if they could be quiet through the lesson, we could work through several examples and we could avert homework. Yet two students near me were saying "homework is just fine" to no complaint from the rest of the class.

And no wonder -- if only 20% of the class (40% with some cajoling) are even doing it, why would the other 60%-80% consider it any harm to not have it assigned in the first place?

I think some harsher requirements and/or penalties are in order. But for now, I have a sub for Monday and have a 4-day weekend coming my way.

Senator Stuart Smalley?

2008-10-30T20:30:00.000-07:00

How did I miss the fact that Al Franken, who played Stuart Smalley among other bit parts on Saturday Night Live in the days of Farley, Spade, Sandler, Myers et al., is poised to win a Senate seat from the state of Minnesota?

Being cool, though, is his special-tea

2008-10-20T10:50:00.001-07:00

Passon Fruit flavored Tazo, to be specific

Tracking the coolness of a teacher

2008-10-18T12:22:00.000-07:00

Excuse the lack of postings the last couple months. I've been settling into my new career. But this story from this week is definitely blog worthy. A student I have just after lunch told me "hey, Mr. Ratliff, I saw you in the parking lot before school.

"You were standing right next to a black Mustang and I was like "woah, Mr. Ratliff!"

"And then you opened the back hatch to your minivan."

Inadvertent pun of the day

2008-09-30T05:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday.

Wife to me: did you get things straightened out with the chiropractor?

Red line to ... God?

2008-09-21T18:24:00.001-07:00

The other day, my friend Kevin called my phone, but actually needed to speak with my wife. We were all at Burger King for a quick rendezvous amidst our crazy schedules, so I passed the phone off to her and said quietly "it's Kevin."

After a short conversation, Larissa ended the call. Clearly Aden was waiting for this moment. He couldn't even finish his bite.

With raised eyebrows and a soft tinge to his voice, he asked mom: "Mommy, were you talking to Heaven?"

Amazing how a paycheck changes one's devotions

2008-09-06T15:45:00.001-07:00

This was my view of the football field at Trinity High School last night:

I don't know how many dozens of games I have watched from those bleachers on the other side of the field. But tonight my new school, where I have taught for a total of 8 classroom days, traveled to Weaverville to play my hometown high school.

There wasn't a question who I was rooting for. Though it did feel odd wearing navy and white amidst the red and white that's felt like home my whole life.

We had a good time. The kids ran around, we found a new Friday night pastime, and despite letting Trinity in the game several times in the first half, the Falcons were victorious. The halftime score was 28-28. 90 seconds into the 2nd half it was 48-28. We left after the third quarter; one of the kids had lost interest (and happiness), and it was 60-28.

But by the time we pulled back into our driveway, two of CVHS's youngest fans had this to say:

I'm a Teacher's Wife Now!

2008-08-15T21:54:00.000-07:00

Hi. The wife here.

My husband has an amazing ability for composition and creative communication of our day-to-day happenings. He's very talented, and I am a privileged partaker of his weekly blogs.

I am taking a moment, today, to give brownie points to my hubby.

We've had a really busy couple of weeks. We've both been spread in different directions, pursuing different venues and ventures as the doors have come swinging open. We've kept praying, kept listening to see if God would lead us "here" or "there" in the midst of all that is busy. We continue to long for wisdom and hope to make the right choices for our family each day.

Today, we had news--Jered got a teaching offer! I'm excited--SO excited--but I am hoping to not steal his thunder as he shares his news with others. My point, in hopping onto our family blog, is to give brownie points to the man who gave me flowers today. I have fresh flowers sitting in our family room! Each time I walk into that room, my day is better!

The other day, he made copies for me in town. That gets major points! (As any of you with two or more kids know--this is a major bummer if you're left to your own demise!) And, after arriving home from dinner in town this evening, Jered mowed part of our lawn in the dark. You see, I am really allergic to grass, and I'm really sick right now. Everything in me wanted to take care of the ghetto grass in front of our house, but I already can't breathe. And, he mowed it--in the dark. I didn't ask him...he just did.

So, with many words written, I must give these kudos to my hubby!
He makes my heart smile! And, I am SO proud of his new position--he's amazing and he'll do great!

Larissa

Linguistics, Part Dois

2008-08-14T08:58:00.000-07:00

As I was entering the last post, literally as I typed "São Paulo," I heard a lady on her bluetooth at the table next to me here in Starbucks in Redding speaking in Portuguese. I think I'm going to go introduce myself.

Linguistics

2008-08-14T08:50:00.000-07:00

This may be of little interest to many readers of my blog. But the operative part there is that this is my blog, so I can be as esoteric as I'd like.

Many of you that I was a foreign exchange student in Brazil about 14 years ago. In fact, it was 14 years ago next week that I got on a jet plane in San Francisco, flew to Chicago, then to Miami, then to São Paulo, Brazil. I am sharing here some interesting factoids about language and dialects:

1) in English and other Germanic languages, accents (dialects) are distinguished based on the way people pronounce vowels differently. For the most part we pronounce all the consonants the same way

2) in Latin languages, accents are distinguished mostly by the way people pronounce the consonants, as vowels have little if any variance from one part of a country to another. In Portuguese, the "r" is pronounced like our "h" in some places, rolled in others, and and like the Yiddish "ch" in yet other areas. There are several other consonants with distinct differences.

3) In American English, we pronounce the "r" differently from all other consonants. Pardon my unfamiliarity with the technical vernacular of linguistic studies, but all other consonants involve some "touch" inside the mouth. The "r" doesn't. I don't know what this means other than maybe we pronounce the "r" incorrectly? Or maybe it should be a vowel.

Some stores just shouldn't ... uh ... mix

2008-08-02T17:20:00.000-07:00

From the associated press, news that a clothing store has successfully applied for a liquor license to house a bar in the middle of their store.

I was reading this story aloud and Larissa commented, "is he crazy? Does he (the owner) realize how many returns he'll get from people who thought they looked good in their clothes?"

The first copy of today's Searchlight to hit the trash

2008-07-30T08:56:00.000-07:00

This morning I delivered papers for a route that includes 2255 Abernathy in Redding.

That's the "transfer station" in east Redding. Otherwise known as "the dump."

This was significant because of today's front-page headline:

Redding waste workers disciplined
Twenty-eight Redding solid waste workers have been disciplined for plucking hot tubs, television sets, barbecues, broken tools and other items from trash and recycling streams, city officials said Tuesday.

I was just glad these aren't delivered in person. "Hi there, here's your paper with a headline splashed across the front that involves, uh, a scandal with your facilities and workers. Have a good day!"

My guess is that this paper, delivered at 3:35, was in the trash before most people had even arisen to see their own copy.

When I zoomed back by at 3:44 on my way back to Old Oregon Trail, I think I spotted three workers scouring their copy of the paper, presumably to pocket the market value of the newsprint and the ink.

Keep a what?

2008-07-29T12:39:00.000-07:00

We had a quick respite from the smoke yesterday and this morning. However, the smoke is rolling back in. From the west. It actually looks just like fog rolling in. But it's not fog.

Before leaving for work, I thought I caught a whiff of smoke. I mentioned this to my wife and mentioned to her to "keep a nose out" for the smoke.

What did I just say?

Well, you can keep an eye out and keep an ear out, but those are both body parts that most of us have two of. As if to say "keep an eye on this, and another eye on whatever you're doing." And it sounded really weird, too. Besides, if you committed your nose to something, you don't have a free nose to tend to your normal duties.

Next time I'll say "keep a nostril out."

Freestyle art

2008-07-20T20:21:00.000-07:00

17-month old girl + homemade pasta figioli soup + 3 minutes alone while dad had to leave the room ... (notice details like wall, floor, etc.)

Bye-bye crib (an interactive post)

2008-07-13T21:14:00.000-07:00

You supply the tagline denoted below by "_____"

Mattress + box spring + frame + headboard = $25 at a yard sale Friday
New mattress cover = $6.97 at Wal-Mart on Saturday
______________________ = priceless

Paralyzed by ... pyrophelia?

2008-07-11T13:16:00.000-07:00

I'm completely addicted to this complex of fires. It probably doesn't help that my office window is probably the singular best vantage point of the Motion Fire in all of Redding. A large maple tree blocks my view of the Moon Fire, but I am the source for the latest unofficial news on the Motion.

Over and out.

Not scoring any points with the Redding Chamber of Commerce with this one

2008-07-09T22:24:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't live near here, that which obscures the sun is the smoke -- primarily from a half-dozen or so nearby (<15 miles) fires.

Oddly, the smoke is actually keeping the temperature capped somewhat. Wait a second, air pollution keeps a lid on temperature increases?

Anyway, the official high here today (at the airport) was 113º, but I don't doubt the veracity of this thermometer just a mile or so from our home. It's the 3rd straight day over 110. Yesterday's official LOW was 89º

This was taken at about 6pm. Click on the picture for a much larger version of it.

But I REALLY don't look like a swimmer

2008-07-08T21:35:00.000-07:00

Nevertheless, I'm giving it a go. I'm having the same internal battle as when I began running almost 4 months ago.

The goal: the Tinman on August 31. That's only 54 days away. The most nerve-wracking part: swimming 740 yards. Without stopping. And no snorkel.

But I'm not a swimmer, so I have to start somewhere. Tonight was that night. With just a few people left in the pool at the Y, I crawled in, goggles and snorkel, and figured I'd give it my best. The pool is 25 yards long. I want to swim 740 yards by the end of next month. That's 30 lengths.

After one length, my left goggle was full of water. During the second length, it filled up again. And again during the third and fourth lengths. Then I wised up and realized that the snorkel was attached to the left side of the goggles, and so I tightened it up and got that part resolved. But I could not get past the gasping for air part. Even though I had a perfectly dry supply of air and could focus only on pumping my arms and legs, I was still breathing very irregularly.

I've been snorkeling before, and this was no different. Well, yes it was. There were no tropical fish in the pool at the Y. Ten lengths (250 yards) and ten stops (one after each of 9 lengths and one during the 8th length when I snorted chlorinated water) later, I was done.

So I'll add a length for every other calendar day (for the goal of 30 by the week before the race), and hopefully get in 2-3 swims a week to gradually stretch this out. Anyone have any other pointers?

Some scenes just defy description or captions

2008-07-07T22:11:00.001-07:00

OK, so I don't look like a runner

2008-07-06T23:04:00.000-07:00

Last Friday, the 4th of July, 2008, I ran the 2nd race of my career. I ran 5 miles in a Chamber of Commerce day in Mt. Shasta, California. I finished. But that wasn't really my solitary goal. I knew I would finish. Secretly, I was hoping to beat 55 minutes.

No, it wasn't even secretly. But that sentence sounded cooler that way.

Matt and I had changed gears late in the week after the 10k race in Weaverville had been canceled due to the smoke that will probably linger through most of the summer up there. After much finagling of transportation, childcare, and work (for him), I ended up driving up, followed about 20 minutes later by him, Hillary, and their youngest. We would be race-day registrants for the 29th Annual Five Mile Foot Race.

This was an important milestone in our preparation for eventually running a marathon next year. The 5k was in May. The half-marathon is in November.

When I parked, I saw someone with an orange vest and the words "Race Official" on it. I asked "is this the right way?" He answered "for the walk?" I started to correct him and say "no, for the run," but figured they were probably registering at the same place and that it wasn't worth the effort.

After registering, I went to the race-day registration table to pick up my bib. This is where it's important to note that there was a 2-mile run/walk event with the same starting time/line. So after paying and getting to the front of the line to get my bib, I say "I'm here to get my packet." I am not making this up -- she motions with both arms pumping and says "for the run?"

OK, folks, I get it. I didn't use to grab bear claws two at a time, but I get it.

I shared with Matt and Hill after the race the subject line for my next blog entry. You see it above. Verbatim.

It gets better.

I left a blog on Mark Swanson's blog entry about having seen him at the race, and congratulating a fellow completer. You should read the comment I left for full context, but in his reply, he mentions the overall winner of the female race, and the fact that she doesn't "look like a runner."

It's OK. I run. And I'm running more. But I am figuring something out. I am probably exerting close to as much energy over these distances as I can or should.

If you don't like a little math with your blog entry, skip down a couple paragraphs to the pictures. But basically, a kilocalorie (which we refer to as simply a calorie) is the energy it takes to propel one kilogram the distance of one kilometer. I currently weigh 118.84kg (that's 262 pounds). Running a pace of around 11:30 per mile, I expend about 1,000 calories per hour. That's a pretty good pace. If I lose 10 pounds and exert the same energy, it stands to reason that I would drop a little time off of my miles.

I hope I'm right.

So I've set mile goals based on weight loss. My faster runs have been under 10 minutes, but not over an extended distance. And I don't know if this is really how it carries out. So we'll see. It also assumes that I am otherwise in the same shape I am in now, but that will also be improving. So we'll see.

At 250, I should run a 10:58 mile. That would also burn 1,000 calories per hour.
At 240, 10:32 is the expected pace. Et cetera.
And at my eventual goal of 200, I should be running 8:46 miles. But if I expect to run that pace now, I'd be burning over 1,450 calories per hour and probably would keel over. So let's not do that.

But now we have the key to better mile times: losing. Weight.

And after about 57 minutes, I made the final turn from Mt. Shasta City's Lake Street, spotted Matt (who had been done about 17 minutes already), and kicked into as high a gear as I could, sprinting past what felt like a hundred people over the final tenth of a mile or so. It was probably only 6 people, but let's not let the facts get in the way here. Matt yelled some encouraging words for me and as I picked it up I could hear him say "yeah! Kick! Go go!" and I went. Happily, my sister was close to the finish line and grabbed a couple shots.

[UPDATE: I have viewed the official results. I finished in 56:50, which was good for 484th place out of 565, 26th out of 27 in my age bracket, and 11th out of 17 in the Clydesdale category (200+ lbs males), and 287th out of 317 overall males]

I'm back a ways. Black shirt. Blue shorts. Like I said, I passed a hundred people. I counted all the people on the sides. True story: one of the ladies who was on the race path actually cussed when I passed her.

Here I am, actually completely airborne. Pumping away. Just like the lady showed me at the registration table.

And the heroes of the story:

Lowly Poop

2008-06-25T22:29:00.000-07:00

Our son is now having moderate success with reading. As long as the words do not contain phonemes of more than one letter or tricky silent letters (even though those two categories constitute an unfair majority of our language), he is beginning to sound out words long and short.

I came home the other day to the news that he had just sounded out "lollipop" in his Sesame Street coloring book. Hilariously, when the fam picked me up from work today, a coworker was eager to hear his literary prowess. I wrote out the word "lollipop" on a sheet of paper and promised him he could shred it when he read it (he loves the shredder). The result was ... "lowlypoop."

Back to the home reading session, though. I then observed as he worked through glasses. Very methodically he sounded out guh - luh - aa -- ss -- ss- eh -- ss, GLASSES!. The next word was "hamburger." He sounded out the individual letters, but got a little frustrated. No big deal -- nobody was pushing him. But he actually asked for help, so mom stepped in.

"What's Cookie Monster holding, Aden?"
"A cheeseburger."
"Close. That's just meat."
"Oh. Meatburger!"
(a stagehand is holding up a "laugh" sign here)
"That's a good effort. Huh -- aa -- mmm ..."
"HAMBURGER!" shouted Aden.

Here's one of him working on the word for "N"

And here he reaches his max at the "M" page

Not to be outdone, Maia has no idea that while she's being entertained, Mom is also cleaning her hands and face. I think it particularly hilarious her reaction near the end when she realizes she's been filmed the whole time (another editor's cut note: she responds to "oh yeah" with either "yeah" or "yup" so listen to her when I ask her "oh yeah?" near the end of this clip):

And another candid one of her playing outside:

Happy Father's Day

2008-06-15T23:29:00.000-07:00

It's a little blurry because the scanner isn't up and running, so I took a picture of a picture.

To the dad who took me to the little league field on Sundays. "Just to play catch." I know now that he was probably learning as much or more on those days as I was. I've long-since forgiven him for nearly taking my head off with a line drive when I was 10. I wanted to see him hit a home run and instead I got to test my 10-year old reflexes from 46 feet away.

To the dad who took me "on the route" whenever he could spare a seat for his milk deliveries around Trinity County. The milk crate that fell on my head only made me stronger. And now I have a whole family that I can buy ice cream for and try to time their licks with a tap on the brakes.

To the dad who took me on a 100-mile round trip drive in my new car (a 1986 Mercury Cougar) the day before I tested for my license.

To the dad who lives across town and now wrestles on the floor with my children.

The memories are countless and could fill up an entire website of their own, and the love is just as boundless. Thank you, dad. I love you. Happy Father's Day!

One tie, one for mom

2008-06-15T12:49:00.000-07:00

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Geneology - Blank family tree

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Genealogist - Family tree template

Accept the compliment!

2008-06-06T02:47:00.000-07:00

Those were the words of a good friend many times during college. We were freshman-year roommates, and his words have resonated as a self-reprimand at times and an exhortation for others as well. It's one of the hardest things to do as a human being. Think about it, how often does someone compliment you and you simply say "thank you."

I often have a retort as to how the issue which they are complimenting me is "no big deal," etc. How crushing for that person who is truly impressed to be told that with which they are impressed is really "no big deal," as in "any old schmuck should be able to handle this."

Our pastor has a line that I like. He recalls a situation where he complimented someone on their singing, to which they replied "it was all God."

"It wasn't that good," he replied.

Yet tonight, when I was working at a local Starbucks on some schoolwork, a good friend came in. We talked briefly about our families, and what I was working on. "You're going to be an amazing teacher," she said.

Wow. There was an internal dialog that was doing its darnedest to deflect that direct hit. But I was really only left with one reply.

"Thank you."

Our little page turner

2008-06-05T00:04:00.000-07:00

Relayed from the wife:

They all enjoyed a morning at Preschool Page Turners at our local library.

A needed a little prodding to go sit with the other children (3-6 year olds). He finally joined his peers, and apparently warmed a bunch of mothers' hearts when he filled in the silence between stories by saying:

"It's so nice to read a story!"

HOO-rah! (an update)

2008-06-02T21:14:00.000-07:00

The dad
Started Boot Camp this morning, sponsored by Fit One here in Redding. The running parts were actually pretty easy. The rest of it worked me over pretty good. It's three mornings a week (5:30a - 6:30a) through July 11 (the subject of this entry is how we answer during roll call). I ran over 12 miles last week and am less than 2 months from finishing credential coursework.

The mom
Started a business called "Simply Defined." She's an expert, and I mean EXPERT at space-saving solutions and organizing. It's a perfect fit for her skills.

The son
Favorite quote from the weekend was while we were in line at In-n-Out before leaving town for a trip to Sacramento for dad's work. He says "hey dad? Where's mommy at?" to which dad answers "she's at Wal-Mart."

After a brief pause he says "nice."

The daughter
In. To. Everything. Mom's breezing by her room today and finds this:

Her solution to being pulled out: opening the next higher drawer and giving that a go.

How I got my nike+ to work again

2008-05-23T21:06:00.000-07:00

A few posts ago, I lamented the fact that my beautiful new nike+ system seemed to be quite a bit off.

First of all, I stopped worrying so much about whether or not my running tracking was completely accurate and accepted the fact that it was good for me. No matter what. Getting out and running 3-4 times a week is better than not running 3-4 times a week.

But then I stumbled upon this very cool website. It doesn't take a terribly technically savvy computer person to figure it out (he has good directions just in case), but basically I still keep my ipod with me on my runs, and afterward use Google Earth to get the exact length of the run. My ipod is still anywhere from 8%-13% off (telling me I'm running faster and/or farther than I really am). As long as that doesn't get to over 30%, then this handy nike+ adjuster will allow me to modify the actual distance covered. This then modifies the xml file on the ipod, recalibrating all the split times I viewed during the run, and uploading the corrected file to the nike website. Now I can again accurately track my daily and aggregate distances.

And I'm pleased to say I've logged 61.46 miles to date. This week called for about 10 miles over 4 runs. And over the next 6 weeks, here are the approximate weekly totals in preparation for the 10k:
5/25 -- 13 miles
6/1 -- 15 miles
6/8 -- 15 miles
6/15 -- 18-20 miles
6/22 -- 14-16 miles
6/29 -- 6 miles in three days, then race day at week's end

They do grow up fast

2008-05-22T00:14:00.000-07:00

About a year ago ...

A couple weeks ago ...

Guest blogger -- Laura

2008-05-20T09:54:00.000-07:00

While Larissa helped a friend with a project yesterday, the kids got to go to the house of some good friends of ours. They have three children: 5-1/2, almost 3, and almost 6 months.

So impressionable was the visit, that Aden got his own blog entry.

Click here to see the original entry. Otherwise, I've pasted the text below. She was kind enough to mask his name, but I've re-inserted it here.

I would have this little buddy over to my house more often...if I could, daily. He just exudes compliments from his lips constantly. I am starting to believe that my house is a castle of extraordinary beauty, even with all the dust, dirt, hand grime, and cobwebs that live here too.

He pays such wonderful, nice, beautiful compliments to anything and everything at my house. Even my outhouse! Well, I had the priviledge to have the little buddy over to my house today.
A conversation from Aden as he goes into the bathroom "outhouse".

Aden (without taking a breath recites):
Wow, what a nice bathroom! Ohps, Did you see that? Toots. I have them.
Oh, look at that BE-U-Tiful butterfly on the picture. Ophs, Did you see? I have the sniffs. Can you get me a kleenex?

Here Aden, here is a tissue. Oh, that is a paper towel? No, it is a tissue.
Oh yes, I use that for when I go Poo Poos to wipe my bott-um.

(Getting up on the stool to wash hands) Oh, WOW. Look at all these mirrors. Look AT ME! I look so nice. That is just so nice.
Lydia (a month shy of 3 herself): I made them.
Aden: Ah, yes you did. That is nice Lydia. Let's all clap for Lydia. (Clapping) Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Lydia!! (Hugs Lydia) Ah, Lydia You so Cute!

Ah, Aden YOU are so cute and you are welcome for a pick-me-up visit anytime to my castle!

Warms a parent's heart.

The Lema Ranch 5k

2008-05-18T23:06:00.000-07:00

Well, that wasn't really the name of it.

But it's tougher to say "Mind, Body and Spirit 5k run/walk benefiting Girls on the Run."

But then again, the Girls on the Run initiative benefited a good cause -- helping 3rd-5th grade girls develop a good physical exercise regimen to help them in all areas of their lives. I can attest to physical exercise being beneficial for other facets of life.

So I guess it's OK to say that really long version.

But my goal was to not walk at all.

The farthest distance I'd gone without walking was 2.0 miles. This was 3.1

The longest I'd gone on the clock without walking was 21 minutes.

So 35 minutes and 28 seconds later, having sprinted the final 50 yards or so, I came across the finish line having met my goal: not walking.

It means that the 4-runs-per-week training that starts tomorrow at 7am is all run. No more walking. None.

Up next: the 10k. Only 48 days away. Below are a couple pre-race shots, one of me on the final stretch, and then after the race with the kiddos.

On your mark, get set ...

2008-05-16T20:51:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow morning.
8:30
Lema Ranch

Happy Mother's Day

2008-05-11T09:04:00.001-07:00

She says the coffee tastes better in this mug.

Me and the kids made it at All Fired Up on Thursday.

It all started with a one-mile run

2008-05-10T09:40:00.000-07:00

Eight weeks ago today, I thought about joining a Saturday mornings running club in preparation for a 5k race in mid-May.

I almost didn't go to that first meeting.

I had a CSET exam in Chico later that day.

What if the run made me tired?

Did I really want to do this?

Well, the answer to the 2nd question was "yes." I went into Fleet Feet earlier that week with the explicit purpose of seeking a running club. Providence had one starting that Saturday.

That day, I went about 1 mile. I ran 2 minutes, walked 2, ran 2, walked 2, until the finish. I was spent.

Today, we went 3.25 miles (about 5.2km). Wednesday I had stretched my first running interval to 10 minutes. Today I wanted to go at least 12. I went 19, then continued with the run 4/walk 1 intervals until the finish (about 36 minutes). And now that I'm on to the trickery of my nike+ system, I'm not deceived by its claims to have gone 3.58 miles. Luckily, I found a very cool application online that overrides the distance for long-term tracking purposes. As disappointing as it is that I've thought I was running farther (and faster) than I really am, I'd much rather have it accurate going forward.

My brother-in-law-slash-running-partner was busy mopping up competition at his own 5k race today, since he can't run in the race next Saturday. He finished in 24:17, running roughly a 7:50 pace.

And after my "big race" next Saturday, the training continues. Here's what's coming ...

Next Saturday, May 17
A 5k run/walk at Lema Ranch here in Redding. I have thought about getting a t-shirt and putting on it: Michael Scott's Dunder-Mifflin Scranton Meredith Palmer Memorial Celebrity Rabies Awareness Pro-Am Fun Run Race for the Cure.

4th of July -- Weaverville

The Timber Ridge 10k. When I was 12, I decided on a whim that I would run the 5k at this annual event. I think I ran the 3.1 miles in about 25 minutes. That makes me sick right now, as I'm pacing somewhere between 10 and 11 minutes, depending on which miles you use.

The toughest part of this run, if Google Earth is right, is a 310-foot climb over a 1.1 mile stretch of the run.

Labor Day -- The Tinman Triathlon
A buddy of mine who lost about half his body weight a couple years ago mostly by running encouraged me to do this. It's a 740-yard swim (a little over 0.4 miles), a 10-mile bike ride, and a 4.5 mile run.

November -- The US Half Marathon (San Francisco)

This one will be cool. But pretty tough. I know that when a running event's website states that there are (quote) 3 challenging climbs (unquote), that it's probably a bit grueling. Definite cool part: running across the Golden Gate.

May 2009 -- The Avenue of the Giants Marathon

This is pretty ridiculous that I'm even posting this. But it fits with the training schedule, and it's really what I set out to do when I first started running. So there it is. Twenty-six and one-fifth miles underneath the canopy of the redwood trees and in the cool environs of the Humboldt County coast.

Right now I don't care as much about times as I do just getting through.

I'll keep you all posted right here on "the cord."

Our family -- Stimulus Package style

2008-05-10T00:06:00.001-07:00

Got ours last Friday.

(By the way -- this picture was taken in mid-February. Remember when regular unleaded was only $3.25?)

The calibrating conundrum

2008-05-08T00:25:00.000-07:00

Through the midst of my recent running binge, there's been a companion faithfully strapped to my arm the whole time: my ipod nano with a nike+ chip in it.

The sensor on my shoe tells the chip everything it needs to know about my current pace, my distance, etc.

Or so I thought.

I began getting a little suspicious after a run with my brother-in-law on Monday. Logged a record mile time (8:55), and that wasn't so much of a surprise, because we were running mostly downhill. (For those of you in Redding, it's the trail that runs from Buenaventura/Placer to the parking lot down Buenaventura near Summit).

And when I turned around, I forgot to look at the pedometer. That's because I was focusing on the fact that I needed to run the last half of the run mostly uphill. And when I got to 3.00 miles (my prescribed distance for the day), I stopped.

When I got to Google Earth, I wanted to make sure it all looked good. And it tracked 1.00 miles no more than 15-20 feet from where I had it. But then it seemed to get weird. The next 0.6 miles or so only came up as 0.51 on Google Earth, and the return trip was equally inaccurate. I ended up assuming that what looked like my turnaround spot on the Google software was off, and that ended up making my stopping point right at 3.00 miles as it should have been.

So I felt fine about it -- until today. Today was 3.0-3.5 at the river trail. We opted to run on the Diestelhorst parking lot side of the trail. The flat part.

Good news? I paced 10:04 over 3.44 miles. That's my farthest run so far, and I cut 4 seconds of my pace of Monday, which was a PR until today.

I knew that I'd turned around at 1.74 miles. And it was easy to spot on Google Earth because the trail curves, and by paying attention to the "elevation" I noticed that it climbed about 12 feet, which was the right hill I ran up before turning around.

Google Earth has that at 1.60 miles. Not 1.74. Crap. That's, like, over 8% off.

Even after I calibrated my running mechanism on Monday morning, it still seems to be not very accurate.

But I feel kind of vindicated, because somewhere in the annals of measurements, among cubits, nautical miles, yards, and meters, is a measurement called "Jered miles." I don't really know how many miles I ran today, but it was farther than I'd run before and at a better pace. So below you can see my run. Except where is says "miles," just replace that with "Jered miles."

Not quite in kindergarten

2008-05-07T08:31:00.000-07:00

Another funny conversation by the boy who starts school in a little over two years.

The Park: Kids' Kingdom, Redding
The Place: Swingset, "big kid" kind
The Pusher: Daddy
The Person next to him: A 9-year old

Said 9-year old is bragging about being able to ride the swing, count to 100, etc. Finally she decides to break the ice with the 3-year old next to her.

"Do you go to school?"

"When I'm older, yes," Aden says.

"I can count to 100," she says.

"Oh wow. That's special!" he replies. (Not in a patronizing tone. He's genuinely excited for her)

"I can count by tens, too, 10, 20, 30, 40 ..."

Right then Aden turns to me over his shoulder and says "that's just like my Cheerios book."

You say pomato

2008-05-07T08:16:00.000-07:00

Mom: Here's your dinner!

Son: Oooooh, yummy tomatoes.

(Mom recognizes the 3-year old's difficulty enunciating the difference between potato and tomato and seizes a teachable moment)

Mom: They're potatoes. With a "P"

Son: (pauses) Puh-tomatoes?

A perspective on running

2008-05-01T00:17:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite local blogs is by a pastor of a local church who took up running about 10 years ago, and who now runs ultramarathons (50 and 100 milers). It's very inspiring.

So I was intrigued by a post Wednesday where he talked casually about the connection between losing weight and running. I've been pondering the same thing.

By the way, I am still running 3 times a week. And I am loving it more and more. We're up to running 4 minutes and walking one. The thought of that made me gasp 8 weeks ago. And my mile time is down to a 10:21 pace. My best mile was a 10:18, meaning I was pretty consistent throughout (though it did take a pretty strong push the last 1/6 of a mile to make that happen).

And I was curious if there was a good way to determine how much my weight impacts my energy exertion and mile times.

Boy is there!

According to this site, if I run 6mph for 31 minutes (which is roughly what I did tonight -- it was actually 5.8mph), it says I would burn 631 calories. My ipod said I burned 614 at the 5.8 pace, so I am guessing this online calculator is pretty accurate.

When I entered my goal weight (almost 70 pounds lighter than current), I would have to run at an 8mph pace to burn the same number of calories in 31 minutes. That's a 7:30 mile instead of a 10:20 mile, just by having 70 fewer pounds to lug around.

I'll be excited to see those mile times drop, but it's a very good perspective. Interestingly, three such runs a week would equal around 1800 calories. Since 3500 calories is roughly a pound, this means that the runs themselves are only burning about a half-pound a week. Naturally there are residual effects (increased metabolism, more health-conscious during the week), but the thought also occurred to me that if I want to stick at this 8-month plateau in my weight loss that I could run and run and run and just be ... an overweight runner!

I'm excited to get back on the healthy-eating bandwagon and see the progress both on the scale and the stopwatch!

Things I rarely finish

2008-04-23T12:05:00.000-07:00

Puzzle books
Pens - they usually get lost before they run out of ink. Except for my Dr. Grip. I love my Dr. Grip.
Pencils - seriously, when was the last time you sharpened a pencil to the little nub that was impossible to hold properly?
Dental floss - it's a fact that the average American household has an entire drawer in their bathroom dedicated to floss they've accumulated from trips to the dentist. I'm not even sure why they sell it in the stores.

But today, in a fit of oral-hygienic awareness, I pulled floss out of my drawer at work, and voilà, I had about 8 inches of floss left.

I couldn't decide whether to be more proud of the fact that I had used an entire container of floss or that I was able to floss teeth with 8 inches of floss.